Monday, November 30, 2009
Today is Monday November 30,2009 and all i can say is WOW its been a long time. I don't even want to address my absence from my blog, i just want to move on and discuss what has brought me back today. I have been extremely busy with a new job I'll discuss in later blogs as well as researching grad schools and life as single 23 year old in the city of New York lol. But on the morning of Thanksgiving i woke up at the freaking crack and decided to take a walk with my puppy Apollo (Yes i have a puppy now). So as you can see alot in my life has changed since July, 5 months ago and it seems like I'm living a totally different life, looking at things a totally different way..and because of those reasons i am here typing away and letting you into my fairly new world.
So as i said i woke up at the crack November 26,2009 and decided to walk with Apollo. It was a beautiful fall morning, i turned my phone off, put Apollo's harnest on and left my house and walked. And i have to say it was the most relaxing and refreshing thing i did in a long time. My mind didn't race like it normally did, it didn't kill itself with negative thoughts, didn't think a million thoughts at once..it was just kinda quiet, taking in the scenery in central park, enjoyed Apollo's character and focused on the last 5 months. I decided to think of the things i was thankful for since it was thanksgiving. Right before i turned my phone off i had to check twitter and saw everyone reasons for being thankful (btw follow me @asunrising lol). I began to think about just that. The things in my life i was genuinely thankful for and i just started to kinda get sentimental. Not in a sad depressing way either. I was reflecting and really thinking deep about my world in the past 5 months and being so completely grateful for everything. Right then and there i decided to create a list of the things i was most thankful for....and share them with you..(there not in any specific order)
1.Me: I have never met anyone like me, I am not perfect and don't claim to be. I am strong and wise beyond my years but have no problem learning more about myself or things around me. I repeat i am STRONG...unless u can read my mind or walk in my shoes u would have no idea what this meant to me.
2.My Brother: My brother is Me..we have lived the same lives up until the age he left for Groton. We don't have to speak and he already knows. He is my life.
3.My Friends: I don't have many and that is the way i like it. People in the past 5 months have left some have joined, has it affected me of course. Am i sad, No. As i have learned, as you move along the road of progression in life people will filter out, some will stay and help you grow and support you. Others will chose to leave or under other certain circumstances want or have to leave. I am constantly growing as a person in so many ways and if your a true friend of mine you recognize my growth and efforts and help me along the way. If not you leave and during your time hear have taught me valuable lesson and for that i am thankful.
If you are HERE u have been the most amazing people to me in the last 5 months and for you i am extremely grateful beyond description. i love u.
4.My Family: Extremely dis functional but very entertaining. Cant live with them and i cant live without them. i love u guys
5. Apollo: Oh man i know he is just a dog but he has taught me so much. I would give this dog the world lol. He has taught me what it is to love something as much as i love me lol. He keeps me company when I'm at my worst and is always at the door wen i get home showering me with unconditional love. It might sound crazy but this is the second time i have felt that love in my life. He is a dog, clearly doesn't speak human language lol but i never feel alone when its just him and I. I love him soo much he makes me sooo happy.
6. My Job: In this recession anybody working is grateful lol. I am beyond that lol.
7. Growth: I am thankful for the fact that i notice my own faults and continuously try to change them. A master piece can not be rushed, so i cant rush my growth..it all takes time. I am growing every minute of the day and i love it. Some people don't have the patience to be around me during this time and that's fine..
8.You: I can tell you anything and i know i wont be judged or told I'm crazy. I feel safe with you in the weirdest ways lol but also afraid of what were capable of. Your amazing and have been one of the greatest gifts in my life.. lol after Apollo lolol...I love u
9.My readers/My Blog: Even though i don't write everyday, i do come back and read over my own blogs to remind myself of my own growth and my own lessons. When i have a rough day i read over your responses and sometimes it brings a tear to my eye. You guys are a big part of my growth as a person and i thank u all so much.
10.EVERYTHING: Everything that is everything going on in my life that didn't get a personal mention. Some things are just more special than others but i am very grateful for what life has offered me in the past 5 months. Maybe in future blogs i will be more specific or maybe just move on from here. I have learned to let go of the past lately and it feels GREAT.
WOW so my first blog in 5 months and it feels good..A good reminder of why i started it. If i don't have to bring work home tomorrow i will be writing another one lolol.. HASTA LUEGO MUNDO TE AMO !!
Posted by Anonymously_30 at 8:53 PM